December Drizzle

"when i looked into your hair,
i could see some drops of rain,

...ohhoo..ohhoo...

so never mind the drizzle,
we still can find a hat,
nothing drops forever,
even cold December Drizzle"

~ Blondie N' Jessica, Dec 2006

renewed faith

The three days off, really paid itself. End up with a much brighter mind and soul, which was tarnished by loads of insomnia, soul break-downs and of course TAR! Smoked less during the days spent in SG, as the law there prohibits smoking ...err... almost everywhere.

Been going around like a lost dog, seeking its master for 'god-knows-what-purpose'. Hanged-out the any corner made available in town. One thing is for sure, cant really get that stoneeed feeling while in the city. Parks and isolated areas did not help either.

Anyhow, manage or 'tried' to snap some photos as promised. I'm pretty bad when it comes to taking your own photo by yourself. sucks.

-correct me if i'm wrong -

-view from the hotel balcony, this looks wrong-

- . . . . i'm so wrong-

change of pace

Taking time off from work and will be heading down to SG on Monday. Sort of a last minute timing and my desicion to head over there was abrupt. Got a call from my elder bro on Thrusday night, saying he will be stopping over there before heading back to KL. What the heck I thought, just get myself over there and stone since accomodation is provided. Applied for leave on Friday morning itself and book the bus ticket. It was the most spontaneous decision for a trip. Bringing along with me will be omaha's camera. Hopefully able to update and upload photos here while I'm there. Peace.

Just for the sake of uploading a photo. Bojans hanging out at kopitiam.

October Updates

Havent been updating my blog recently probably due to an uneventful month and working graveyard hours. Been reading a book I got from the bookstore two weeks back and been with it ever since. Havent been reading any books since Harry Potter, cant remember the last title (I know its lame). A slow reader one would say, for a few chapters each day. Looking forward to my next book after this one. Just keeping myself occupied as I cant even last 30 minutes on single player computer games anymore.

And not forgetting, Grouch Bojan. Good stuff on the song "Cement Shoe". Thats awesome man! JanGan HisaP DaDah!

nothingman

Its a fact: I have done nothing in my life.

Went back home after sitting at the burger stall looking at people go by. It was few hours passed Merdeka count-down. The bojans were not there today. Somehow sitting by myself at the stall, must have felt like victory. No arguements, no chattering sound, no nothing. Just me and my pack of smokes.

Anyway went back home and had my burger in front of the TV. My bro was still awake. "No plans, no parties?", I asked. He was actually getting ready to go out. Oh that sounded cool, 3.30am and the party has just started. There was a party going down at Holiday Villa, frens just booked a room for the night of drinks and getting high session. (Dont get any dumb and dirty ideas). BTW, my bro is just 19+ and they really knew how to have fun. Alright fine, upon sending my Bro to the hotel. Suddenly I felt like wanna join these fellas and see how it goes as I already know some of his friends. Damn needed to have some alcohol to drink as well. (Note: I'm not alcoholic and I rarely booze).

Just when reaching the room, I notice that some were already like wasted. Booze cans, Liqiour Bottles, soft-drinks, ciggratte buds, ashes, packs....everywhere. It was like a Junkie's paradise. Already felt like getting stoned. Some my bro's frens were like surprised and welcomed my presense, they we a cool bunch of teenagers. hmmm...I thought to myself, my bunch of people - English speaking, crazy in a way, but minus the drinking and the happy behaviours.

Anyway, lit up my smoke, and poured some a quarter full of Gin and 3/4 coke. (no idea what gin was it dont ask, and dont ask what combination I just did, cause I dont know how was it supposed to be dranked). Sat down, and just enjoy the company as a stranger. As time passed, I realised that I never had this sort of thing before. There were like two chicks, speaks fluent English, and they were like close to everybody and they were really a great bunch. Some were wasted on the bed, some sitting on the sofa, on the floor and they were like comfortable with each other. I just had to drink more.

Im probably more comfortable being that stranger in other people's life. Shiet, if I had not joined these people, I was just that loner in that burger stall. Farking hell, I cant relate to people at all.

I can easily say that all of my bro's friends had a relationship or is in a relationship, that includes my bro. Me, on the other hand, no relationships, no boozing, no girls, no hobbies, no nothing. I cant even finish my glass of Gin that night. I even work in the same place as my first-job for 2 years plus. Fark, Im screwed. Now people my age are like planning all kinds of future, and here I am dont even have a plan or scheme. I'm Farked.

I wish an alien would just come and take me away. Advise: Dont be the stoner that I already am.

Final Note: People always ask me why do I wear that dumb fisherman hat. Dont ask me, I dont have the answer, because im a farking weirdo.

staying chilled

Give me back my point of view
'Cause I just can't think for you
I can hardly hear you say
What should I do, well you choose

~ Jet - Look What You've Done

nothing

sometimes I just prefer the emptiness. consume me now and let me be with my misery.

Im always crazy like that

You were always the mysterious one with dark eyes and careless hair
You were fashionably sensitive, but too cool to care

You were always brilliant in morning
Smoking your cigarettes and talking over coffee

You took your coat off and stood in the rain
You were always crazy like that

~ Jewel - Foolish Games

Mazzy Star - Fade Into You

I thought I was through with this song. But a recent encounter made me play this chilling music again. I guess this one of those songs that could cope and content my feelings rite now. Sometimes I wish it would never end and sometimes didn't want it to begin in the first place. It’s the strangest, insignificant feeling, drown in hopelessness and torment. Blanketed with warm-sweet intimacy. ~stoned

-click play to start music-
Mazzy Star - Fade Into You

on vacation

Just received email from my manager on our company trip itenary. In another ten days I will be seeing myself in Phuket Island. cool, sounds interesting. 10 people, one return flight, 3 days, one bag, and lots of smokes. Its probably not very entertaining when you are somewhere without your mates. But whatever gives, I'm there where ever I may roam. And to start with, I'll just blend into the scenery. Better off with that than people. Just like the stone on the beach. Not into seeking any thrilling experiences or looking forward to the excitement. Just looking out for a great spot for the stoner to stone. Any how I'm not good at expressing my self either. So shutdaFackup and chill la joe.

pondering

Idleness makes our mind thinker and spiral. Does a mind spiral, I wonder.

Where can we go? What can we do? Thats been the question always. To stone or not to? Does not seem to matter as well.

Cock rubbish is this. Simply. Nothing. Stone.

Who are you in Star Wars?

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away... I was...



Take the test and check out if you were the Jedi in Star Wars.

native wisdoms

"Silence is the absolute poise or balance of body, mind and spirit. The man who preserves his selfhood is ever calm and unshaken by the storms of existence ... What are the fruits of silence? They are self-control, true courage or endurance, patience, dignity and reverence. Silence is the cornerstone of character."

~Ohiyesa, Santee Sioux~

nice to know you

-click play to start video-
Incubus - Nice To Know You

Personality Disorder

Whats your personality disorder? I could already tell what were my disorders were, just that I needed to know what were the terms. Here are the results of my test.

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Disorder:	Low
Schizoid Disorder:	Very High
Schizotypal Disorder:	High
Antisocial Disorder:	Moderate
Borderline Disorder:	Low
Histrionic Disorder:	Low
Narcissistic Disorder:	Low
Avoidant Disorder:	High
Dependent Disorder:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	Low
Description of each Disorder Personality Disorder Test - Take It! Personality Disorders

You could post your results under comments, if you would like to share.

What do you think of Choon Bojan?

Just a survey or test to see how would you think of me. Based on your opinion, please choose the characteristics or qualities that you think I have. The link to the personality test as follows:

Choon's Johari Window

Anyone who knows choon is invited!

annual meeting

This is where I currently work. Bunch of renegades, night-owls and lone gunners.

Feel Good Inc.

-click play to start video-
Goriilaz - Feel Good Inc.

Creep Animation

watch radiohead - creep animation, characters based from 'Low Morale'